EXCELLENT!!!!!!!!! Many laughs from this one!
Mary
Gary Schloss wrote:
> Hanz "van Sherlock" Holmez wrote:
>
> >The moment people started to take Kelton's funmail seriously I just *had*
> >to weigh my SC E.Zuiko 135mm/F2.8 and my MC Zuiko 135mm/F2.8, and the
> >results are shocking! The SC lens weighs 367 g, the MC version -- 351 g.
> >The real shocker is that according to Olympus, this lens is supposed
> >to weigh exactly 360 gram!
> >
> >So what's happening here? Is this Yet Another Conspiracy Theory?
> >
> >My Zuik bro's and ho's, this calls for an in-depth investigation!
>
> (I must admit that our van Sherlock didn't really use exactly those
> words to write the last sentence, but I think he won't mind :-))
>
> After learning about Hanz's above shocking discovery, it took me only
> a few minutes on the internet to figure this one out. According to
> www.blackhelicopters.com, all Zuiko 135mm/f2.8 lenses were exported
> from Japan to a rural airport in Mena, Arkansas. From there, they
> were distributed to the rest of the world. The whole operation was
> run by the late Vince Foster, on behalf of Bill and Hillary Clinton.
>
> My source advises me that all the incoming lenses were identical in
> weight: 360 g. While in Mena, the SC lenses were made a little
> heavier because they were stuffed with shredded Rose law firm
> documents, now missing from the Whitewater investigation (indeed,
> "SC" stands for "Sinister Conspiracy"). So, if you own a SC 135/2.8,
> expect a visit from Ken Starr's "dream team".
>
> OTOH, the "MC" lenses came in with a clear coat of pure Columbian
> cocain ("MC" stands for "Mucho Cocaino"). This cocain was removed
> at Mena, and resold by the Clintons to the Hollywood moguls for
> political campaign contributions. This explains these lenses'
> extraordinary uhm, huh... weight loss?
>
> My source is 100 percent sure of the veracity of these allegations.
> In fact, he used to work as a security guard in the above Arkansas
> facility, and claims to have witnessed the entire process. I was
> able to verify that such a facility indeed existed at the time, and
> was situated next door to the very Arkansas motel where then governor
> Bill Clinton used to rape women and procreate with black ho's, on
> weekdays and on certain weekends after church when Hillary had her
> witch practice.
>
> See, it all becomes crystal clear once you consult with the right
> people, or more precisely, with the people on the right. :-)
>
> P.S. To the humor impared, the above was a satire. It is not the
> truth. It was written for entertainment purposes only. It is not
> to be taken seriously or literally, and it is not to be taken out
> of context. /G.S.
>
> P.P.S. I wonder how long it'll be before this story appears on
> Mutt Sludge's web site... :-) /G.S.
>
> Cheers,
>
> /Gary Schloss.
> Studio City, California, USA
> schloss@xxxxxxxxxxxxxx
>
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