On Sunday, June 27, 2010, Chuck Norcutt <chucknorcutt@xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx> wrote:
> Sorry, I don't remember at all. Is there a proper procedure? Must I
> follow it when breakfasting with the queen?
One must fill a crystal trifle bowl near to brim with a barely folded
together balance of jam and cream (they should be poured
simultaneously, jam in left hand, cream in right). Then, with a pair
of ivory tongs, gently push a single scone to the bowl's bottom. With
hands held in the traditional position of the Royal Salute of The
Queen's Hebridean Fishing Guard (that is, tucked into each opposite
armpit), fully submerge one's head in the bowl and begin bobbing for
that baked good as if your title depended on it. Once retrieved, stand
straight, and shake your head like a muddy Old English Sheepdog.
This is the way Henry VIII and his Good Lord intended, and anything
less than this marks you as a right colonial, possibly even Roman
Catholic.
Pip-pip, tally-ho and hooroo. Must dash.
Cheerio,
Sir Chumley Humbert Mumblebottom-Smythe
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