Hi Fellow Zuiks,
I'm going to skate over thin ice here. (For those who have difficulty with
English language idiom, that means "do something perilous".)
It pains me to read as I do sometimes on this list, about people (and lets
face it, it's mainly guys) being intimidated in regard to following a hobby.
Now; I know that different societies have different ideas of what is acceptable
behaviour. What is OK here, may not be OK there, and so on. I could maybe
be called a misogynist; my marriage is of low quality and I don't care. I'm not
prepared to meekly put up with being "put down" and disrespect. So what I
write now has to be read with those qualifications in mind.
What I see in society these days is that it is Politically Correct to "put
down"
men in all walks of life, in all endeavours. It's worst in teaching; here in
NZ,
there is a constant call for more male teachers; that society is being
impoverished and twisted through boy pupils not having male role models in
their teachers. But you see what happens to any male who dares to put their
name forward as a kindergarten teacher, or a "new entrant" teacher. They are
treated as if they are a child molester who has dared to"come out of the
closet" - that there must be something queer in their mental makeup. It is
not sufficient for them to say that they like kids and working with them.. And
any older male who is forced to take a change of career and wants to try
teaching, especially is treated with the utmost scorn and turned away before
getting a foot in the door.
So - what's wrong with having photography as a serious hobby?
Sometimes it is that the hobby is treated as a challenge, another love, by
the wife who sees it as a rival to be put down immediately. A non-person that
she has to compete with for attention and she can't even give that non-
person a piece of her mind! (Yes, this happens, but I won't make this longer
with a real-life example). However, often, it seems to me, it is simply a
matter of disrespect, a matter of assuming that the photographer male is
inherently incapable of doing anything of value and worth other than bringing
home the cash required to support the family. That if it is not the primary
job,
then it is something trivial, to be treated with scorn and not as a legitimate
activity and interest. That the male must at all times be subservient to the
needs of the family and spouse and have no interest to engage the mind
outside that area of interest.
Well, I have no patience with this treatment and frame of mind.
But for those who wish to preserve a harmonious marriage as well as engage
with respect in their hobby, what to do? You want to be taken seriously in
this matter.
After all the long rave above, all I can offer at this point is to suggest that
you
produce pictures worthy of admiration and have them framed and displayed
in your home where all can see them. Insist there be a place made for some
on your walls. Make them of good enough quality that they just MUST be
admired.
Insist in having some money of your own that you can use in pursuit of your
interest without further question, that you have to answer for to no-body but
yourself. And get on with it..
This may of course just bring on another attack of "put down the male". And I
have no answer that fits in, except to stand up for your rights to respect and
to have an interest in what you believe in; and take the flak. But, here my
limitations let me down and I don't know what could be best for others.
Brian
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